ENOUGH

Several times you test me, 

With all that lies and all that faults.

Every time you came up with, 

A new mistake yet as same.

Innocent smile and words of love, 

Was enough to hide the truth.

Always had a good excuse, 

To bring your faults to a halt.

Having me all to go through this, 

Have left me in abyss.

Enough of all your deceit,

Enough of lies and all your faults.

The Calm Before The Storm

Life can be misty, life can be calm.

Some may just feel, that it has no harm.

For some it can be, like stormy  seas.

Colors of rainbow, for some it can be.

Those who that has the flair of it.

Will know it has some beauty to fit.

Violet and orange, and calmness of green.

Soothing of blue and Fire of some red.

Gentleness felt like that of  Indigo.

Happiness of yellow is felt in the go.

Some are just blessed with half of the colors.

Only a glimpse for just some others . 

Raging of winds for some it can be. 

Bumpy and lumpy for some roads can be.

No one does know when calmness they feel.

What storm is ahead and what may they face.

BEAUTY

Splendid beautiful faces.

Awesome smooth skin.

Sparkling lovely eyes.  

Sends signals down their spines.

Many of them wish. 

To have that  charming  smiles.

To soothe the raging fire. 

That burns in their souls.

Beauty which they see. 

Can make up all their day.

Beauty that is true.

Is often dealt as play.

IN TO THE LIGHT

Days went by. It is almost a year and half to our relationship. When I recall all the moments, all the incidents, all that time we spent together and all that happened nothing seems worth.  What I see is only suffering, what I see is deceive, what I see is all broken trust and broken promises.  Things that happened made me think, it made me realize life is not all about loving someone or being loved. Loving is not always having or being with the one who you love.  Life has more to it.  It made me realize sometimes we have to let go of the things we want and we love for the good of others.  It made me realize few moments of happiness are not everything. It made me realize, love has to be from both side. It made me realize, love is a gentle feeling which liberates all our fears, and all our insecurities. Not something which add fuel to it or make things worse.

What I experienced only made things worse. My fears, my insecurities, my beliefs and my faith towards love and life all were shattered.  What I dreamed to have with him went in drain. I had to move on. I had to think deeply on my wants and my need in the long run. My brain worked well for me. Alhamdullillaahi. It raised questions on what was happening in my life. Questions like, are you willing to go through the same thing once again? Do u really think that you can survive such pain in the long run? Do you wish to be truly happy or just waiting for him to give you bits of happiness whenever he feels like? Which made me look at all the signs. It kept on telling me not to close my eyes and not to think from the heart. An inner voice kept on telling me this time to use my brain. Which made me look for solutions and I was brought back into the light.

Well, this is not a tale. This is my life.  All that happened will stay with me. It will inspire me to avoid such incidents. Though there is so much pain right now. I know for sure that this day shall pass like any other days. Right now it is so hard to go on. So hard on me just to think about what has happened. I do believe everything happens for a reason. That reason only Allah knows. But for sure has some good and  this shall pass soon. I know what I want now.  I know that there is no one who can help other than Almighty Allah. It is going to be only my efforts which will lead me to forever lasting peace and happiness.  Now and in the hereafter. 

I don’t have anyone to blame for what happened. My only advice for my special someone is for him to know that what goes around might come around.  My wish and my prayers for him will remain the same.  May you be blessed with happiness and everlasting love. May He pour upon you his guidance and knowledge so that you live a life among the righteous.

I start anew with new hopes and new dreams.  I start anew with an aim and a belief in my heart to walk the path. Knowing that I am not alone. Knowing that Allah is always with me to guide me. 

SILENT WORDS

My heart my soul, forever it shall cry.

For unbound love forever it shall pry.

Silent though I stay so hard I try.

To seal my tears and hide my cries.

Chains of facts made soul deprive.

Unsaid words made heart go dry.

Special Prayer For A Special Someone

A heart full of love, a heart full of care

A heart not wrong, a heart that is strong.

A homely feel for you  to heal.

A calm serenade for you to zeal.

A lover’s affection for all your needs.

With much of grace, that never do fades.

Happiness in abundance, with much of praise. 

All this and more for you I pray.

I'd Rather...

I've always wished for soothing.

I've always  wished for peace.

Some just don't deserve it.

Some efforts go in vain.

Patience and obedience.

Some lack in their vein.

I've tried to make one better.

I've tried to make one straight.

So tired to further go on.

So tired of all the faults.

I'd rather stay lonely.

Than rather in this pain.

MY WISH

Across the deep oceans.

Along the golden lanes.

May you always enjoy.

The joyful coastal rains.

Apart from the chaos.

Apart form the mist.

May you always enjoy.

The blissful life and plans.

So hard though to let go.

So hard though to turn.

Happiness of few others.

Comes  up in my brain.

Some pains always be there.

Some pains subside with time.

My heart still carries on.

Asking for your gains.

Though not mine to hold on.

Though not mine to have.

My wish never changes.

My wish just the same.

MEMORIES

Thoughts of moments which went by.

Dreams of sweet lullaby.

Memories bitter, sour and sweet.

All of which so fond to keep.

How can someone dare not take.

What she wished for when at track.
Though her heart was at stake.

Kept on making same mistake.
What she had was partly fake.
Kept on dreaming though awake.

Memories can be rough at times.
Sometimes happy, at times sad. 
Time can only make it fade.

Day and Night

Day and night she awaits,

To hear a voice she craves.

Truly knowing what it takes,

To share a love is an ache.

Barely does she gets to see,

What she wishes all awake.

Rarely she can be with him, 

And her heart so does break.

All her time she hopes and prays, 

Safe and sound for him to make.

Happily always she will be, 

To know for sure he is safe.

Loving is not always about having.

Everlasting ever growing, some may want that ever flowing.

Although sometimes hard ongoing, some may keep up still on trying.

Sweet essence of love and caring, everyone want is ever glowing.

Apart or together are they staying, one can keep on always praying.

Knowing of absence yet not breaking, what in her heart  still  believing.

Harder her time it may be making, Yet still hoping yet believing.

Almighty Allah she keeps on asking,  to make come true what she is hoping.

Life's hardship however  much tiring , she keeps on moving without complaining.

Year gone by loving and caring,  days that went by without hearing.

Loyal  she stays praying and praying, although she know loving is not having.